IN
MEMORIAM
This life is not conclusion
A sequel lies beyond
Invisible as Music
As popular as sound
Emily Dickinson
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Nora
is survived by her daughter, Mary Ellen, of Patchogue and Scarsdale.
She was predeceased by her husband, Charles, in 1969. In lieu of
flowers, memorial contributions may be made to Brookhaven Adult Day Care or the Alzheimer's Association. Condolences may be sent to: 185 Bay Ave., Patchogue, NY 11772.
Linda Tabachnik writes: "I found my fourth grade class picture with Mrs. Smith. We really 'dressed up' for our picture! I admired and respected her. I was sorry to hear of her passing. Because of teachers like Mrs. Smith, I too took the path to teaching others."
"If
you misbehave I'll turn you into a spot on the floor,"
Claire Siegel recalls Nora Smith admonishing her
4th graders at Bay. "Of course, they had no idea what that
statement meant! Just one disapproving look
from Nora was all that was needed to keep room discipline so they
never had to find out what Claire's daughter remembered being in Nora's class. She said that Mrs. Smith knew how to hold the children's attention. She remembered that Nora read aloud to the class daily. Many books were completed in installments and listening to them was the highlight of the day. Her pupils loved Nora, flourished under her care and remember her with great respect and affection.
At one time
Nora was
the principal of the Brookhaven
School. Florence Holz taught there and loved to
tell the soccer game story .At recess the faculty
went outside and played with the children. Nora decided to teach them to play soccer and ~ assigned everyone to a position. All were in place and then the first ball that was kicked hit Nora in the head and knocked her out cold. The teacher's
rushed to help
Mary
Sayer recalls that "Nora and I served as Building Reps
together when I first went to Bay. Here
was a woman who looked like a petite Mrs. Claus with a twinkle
in her blue eyes, but who quietly and efficiently got things
done. She was gentle and sweet; I never saw her frown. Lack of a
smile and a stern voice was enough to get your attention. She was
a true lady ." Claire
Siegel was visiting Bay Avenue when a "new" principal
mentioned that a strange little old lady appeared
at the school door several mornings before school started.
Neighborhood children knew her and took
her home. (Nora lived a block away from Bay.) ~ Tears came to
Claire's eyes. She said, "That was no strange lady. She
was a great teacher, Her name is
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Edward
J. Wakim, 68, of
Bellport,
died on March 3. He teacher, having worked for the district for 32 years. He
coached Ed He of
science in education and received his master's degree
from Queens College. Condolences
may be expressed to his wife, Patricia: He
is also survived by daughter, Kimberly Sheridan; sons,
Christopher and Jonathan; sisters, Juliette Jeanette
Fanning; and grandchildren, Cole
Wakim and Luke and Memorial
contributions may be made to Brookhaven Hospice,
105 West Main Street, Patchogue, NY 11772, and would be appreciated by the family.
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Elizabeth "Betty" Clarke recently passed away. "Betty" taught primary grades at Bay and Tremont for many years. She lived in Port Jefferson with her husband, Frank, who predeceased her in May. Condolences may be sent to her daughter: Barbara Scott, 1170 Foster City Blvd., Unit 111 Foster City, CA 944404
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Roland West, who taught at Eagle for many years, passed away on October 13, 2002. His remains were cremated and will be buried at Forest Lawn Cemetery in Beverly Hills, California. He chose to be close to the actresses whom he adored for many years. He is survived by a brother in Seattle.
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A Man Outside Himself by Vinny Carfora He unknowingly began teaching me before we ever met. As a freshman entering Patchogue High School (now Patchogue-Medford High School) I heard rumors of two chemistry teachers whom fate joined at the hip. Their names were Dick Caliendo and Dan Visconti. Rumors said they were hard and tough teachers who insisted misguided students perform "slave labor" for the most minor infractions. While in essence the rumors were not lies, they certainly were not the truth.
I remember the first time I met Dick Caliendo. Of course, he had on his white lab coat. He was extremely friendly and wore this humongous smile amidst this amazingly kind face. Indeed he was a demanding and tough teacher. He was demanding in that he required students to stretch themselves beyond simple thinking. Mr. Caliendo fully expected his students take information distributed, put it together, and hopefully learn something from the experience. Yeah, he was really tough. He actually expected students to behave in his class, complete the assigned work, do homework and be respectful. Nevertheless, "slave labor" like most misnomers, was not what it was purporting to be. It often became more pleasure than punishment. However, unlike the image of his misaligned reputation, he was one of the most compassionate, gentlest, kindest and understanding persons, including teachers, I would ever meet. Do not misunderstand me, he could......
His caring and love extended beyond the classroom. Even when he was not a student's teacher, he often stood outside his classroom greeting students and asking them how they were doing. These were not just empty words of obligation but expressed the sincerest concern and empathy. He really wanted to know. I know he made my high school experience easier and more pleasurable.
One of the really great attributes about him was that he did not forget students after graduation. If he saw a former student Upstreet, they could expect a greeting, a bear hug and a deluge of questions. After college, when I began substitute teaching at Patchogue-Medford High School, he was always available for advice and counseling and sometimes a pat on the shoulder. I soon discovered we belonged to the same chch adn it was there that I met his wonderful wife, Delma. Through her, I discovered what a fantastic Father and Husband Dick was.
During this period, I was not aware he was suffering from Hodgkin's disease. It was only later that I learned about his illness from a friend. That was so typical of Dick. When someone was with him, he would talk about everyone and everything but himself. Even when a friend directly asked personal questions, he never let them know the pain and suffering he was experiencing on a daily basis. Although when first diagnosed, the doctors' prognosis was extremely negative, he remained positive. A gentleman with an unbelievably strong wife and and extremely unshakable faith, he showed the doctors a tremendous weapon.
In the nearly thirty years since, we remained friends. Their move to New Jersey greatly saddened my wife Ann and me, but we remained connected through cards, e-mail and letters. Although he had numerous physical ailments throughout the years, he never burdened his friends nor did he complain to them. His pain and suffering are over. However, that is not what I will remember. Rather, I will remember this inherently very kind religious gentleman with the greatest admiration, love and respect that he deserved as a human being and educator. Surely the Angels that accompanied him on his new journey, which began December 13, 2002, must feel privileged. While Dick was on Earth, I felt privileged he counted me among his countless friends. On my desk, ever since he gave it to me years and years ago is a science lab beaker (given by Dick to numbers of people). Hand etched into it: PHIL 1:3,4. I hadn't checked the biblical reference in a long time... .....I give thanks to my God at every remembrance of you, praying always with joy in my every prayer for all of you.... So too I will always give thanks for having known such a wonderful man. Within my many memories of Dick I treasure his role as a teacher. In my estimation he was THE model. No educator I've ever known was more respected and effective with students, parents, colleagues, than Dick. He touched and positively influenced so very many lives of young people and of his teaching brethren. What a blessing to have known and worked with him. SAINT Richard (I truly believe he lived as a Saint amongst us) has returned to his Lord. He always had all of us in his prayers. He's now in "Headquarters" where surely he'll wield great influence. God rest his soul; God bless his wife and children, and all of us, his friends.
Dan Visconti wrote: Phil Sheridan and I met Jack Sexton i Whiting, New Jersey as we went there to pay our respects and offer our support to the family I have known for years. I promised myself that I would not break down so that I could be strong for their sake. I failed. I really did not want to see my friend in a casket. I feel better now that I know his pain of 23 years is over. Dick and I felt like the Corsican brothers, I knew when he was in pain. I just could not relieve him of that pain. I kept a statue of St. Jude in repair (it was slowly eroding) because I felt it kept him going so that he could see his children grow and watch his grandchildren get bigger. With all his suffering he never once asked God "why me?" He accepted the cards he was dealt and showed everyone he met his crazy smile, even when he was in pain. He called me his brother, and I was honored. I will miss him dearly. My memories of him will always be with me. To relive those nutty times in chemistry would indeed be a gift from God. I have such mixed emotions regarding my brother. I am sad that I will no longer see him or talk to him. I will miss his crazy smile. I am glad his pain has ended. He had enough. This friend, this brother of mine was loved by all who met him. His students absolutely adored him. After all he was nutty as I was. He was a father, grandfather, friend, brother, father confessor and so many things to those he knew. It is nice to realize that we were the lucky ones who had the experience of his friendship and love. As I write this my memories wander over the past years of the good times and the hard times we all felt knowing him. We all die someday, but if we really believe...then we shall all meet again
Sandy and Frank Candito wrote: Dick was a great person and teacher. Our prayers go out to his family.
Phil Sheridan wrote: Dick Caliendo was a guy who cared for others more than he cared for himself. He truly cared for his students and it showed, making him one of the most popular teachers in the high school. Not too many teachers had the yearbook dedicated to them twice.
The incident I most remember describing Dick's caring occurred during his bout with Hodgkin's lymphoma. The high school teachers took turns driving him to Slon-Kettering Hospital where he received his devastating chemotherapy treatments. Dick was incapable of driving after receiving his treatments due to extreme nausea and so he took a pillow and barf-bucket with him for the ride. During a trip with me he missed the bucket, hitting the back seat of my car. Here was a guy, ravaged by Hodgkin's disease, unable to sit up due to violent nausea from chemotherapy, unable to converse properly, and what does he do? He sits up, tries to clean the back seat, and apologized in so profuse a manner that it was matched only by his profuse nausea. His concern was me and my car seat, not himself and his condition. This was a guy who really cared about others.
There will be a memorial service held on Long Island TBA.
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Rupert C. Parks, 93, of Plainview, formerly of Bayport, died on December 20, 2002. His family moved to Patchogue in 1924 and he graduated form Patchogue High School where he was on the basketball and tennis teams. After graduating from college in 1934, he was employed by the Patchogue schools as a teacher, and later as principal at Medford and Tremont Avenue schools. In 1955 he became assistant superintendent of BOCES II. He retired in 1971 and was later employed by an insurance company. Rupert served in WW II in the 88th Infantry Division of the U.S. Armyduring the Italian campaign. He was awarded the Bronze Star and was granted a battlefield commission as lieutenant. He was past commodore of the Domino Yacht Club, East Patchogue since 1937, was a past member of Southside Lodge No. 493, F & AM, a former member of Brookhaven Memorial Hospital Advisory Board, a member and past president of Kiwanis Club of Patchogue and a former member and president of Suffolk School Administrators. He and his wife spent many winters in South Pasadena, Florida.
Mr. Parks is survived by his wife, Alice: two nieces: four great-nieces: and one great-nephew.
Funeral arrangements were entrusted to Bayport-Blue Point Funeral Home. A memorial service was held at the funeral home on Saturday, January 11, with the Rev. Noel Koestline officiating. Cremation was private.
Memorial contributions may be made to Bayport United Methodist Church, Brookhaven Memorial Hospital Medical Center, or to the charity of your choice, would be appreciated by the family.
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Dedicated wife, mother and teacher, died on May 7, 2003 in Dunedin, Florida. Survived by her daughter and son-in-law, Jill and Bruce MacDougal. Muriel will be remembered as a cat lover, a political savante and one of three founding members of a non-profit organization formed in memory of her husband, Bill, who died in 1996. The organization awards financial aid to high school juniors who are embarking on the college search and are the children of teachers or single parents, or the first members of their families to apply to four-year, degree-granting institutions. Historical Footnote: The very first organizational meeting between the Patchogue Classroom Teachers Association (PCTA/NEA) and the Patchogue Federation of Teachers (PFT/AFT) for the purpose of writing a constitution for a merged organization, later to be known as the Patchogue-Medford Congress of Teachers (PMCT/AFT/AFL-CIO), was held at the O'Brien's home in Patchogue.
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NORA
BANKS SMITH
EDWARD
WAKIM
